Moses

Moses has always been one of my favorite characters in the bible. I don't know if it's because he gets to part the red sea or if it's because he gets to free his people from Pharoah, or if it's because he gets to hear God's voice. I know other characters in the bible get to hear God's voice too, but Moses gets to be a hero when he hears God. I'm jealous. Maybe I'm not paying attention to God and that's why I don't get to hear him, maybe I'm so bad that I don't deserve to hear him, or maybe he just hasn't said anything to me yet. I know that we were supposed to be reading the bible as a piece of literature and not necessarily as a book of faith. I'm not programmed that way though. I have some very strong convictions and some very major flaws when it comes to the bible. I feel that Moses embodies both these characteristics too, but mainly that he can overcome any doubt he has about God. Maybe that's the real reason I like Moses so much. He was able to do what I haven't been able to accomplish. I, more than anything, want to leave behind something for my family to be proud of me about; whether it be kids, a career where I made a difference, or a legacy of some other kind. Moses is immortalized by those thin white pages of the bible. The whole Jewish community can be proud of him, they can relate to him, they can cheer him on still. I feel like I've been a failure for most my life. The biggest thing I've ever done was take care of people. I still do that. I work at the hospital and as much fun as that is, I don't feel it's rewarding enough. I don't feel like I really make a difference in anyone's life. I'm sure Moses thought he could have done better or made quicker, smarter decisions that lead him to get his people into the promised land without wandering the desert for 40 years, but that still doesn't take away all the good he accomplished. Then again, maybe it really was the parting of the red sea that made Moses so much fun for me! Here's a little cartoon for some laughs!

Esther

The book of Esther is my mom's least favorite book of the bible. I don't agree with her on this, but I'm not sure I'd say it's near the top 10 for me either. It was super fun to do the play about it and all, but the overall story is one that I can't say I really agree with. Why does she have to prostitute herself out to save the Jews? Really? That's what God's plan was? Somehow I find that totally ridiculous! I'm damn sure God could have come up with a better plan to save the Jews other than seducing a king. I know Morticai had a lot to do with the decision to go forward with the plan, but now this story is honored as one of the greatest contributions that women have made to the Jewish people. I find it disturbing that a tale about trickery, sex, and hatred for a nation can be justified as something wonderful. Then again most prize winning novels would be considered to fall into one of these groups. What a pity. What I'm unclear about though, in the book of Esther, is what happens to the queen when king crankypants isn't happy with her not coming to his side when he so commands? I don't know why it bothers me so much to know what happens to this queen, but it really bothers me. She is treated like a nothing character, but all that happens with Esther becoming queen after her and all that, is only doable because the first queen ticks off the king. Doesn't this bother anyone else? It's so frustrating reading stories where the pivitol reasoning for something and the character who causes the situation to happen don't get a fair write off. There's just nothing. NOTHING! That makes no sense to me. I mean at least banish her off to some far away kingdom or have her beheaded or make her a slave or something, but don't just forget to finish her story. I still think she has a big part in this story and I want an ending for the first queen. Hmmm, maybe it should end with her being beheaded...more King Henry VIII style right?

Jokes

I thought some of these jokes were just too funny. Hope everyone gets a good laugh!

Presentations

The presentations that we had to do in class as a group were so much fun to watch, but getting to know my group members was even better. It's so hard to make a connection with people when a you can't talk to them. People will sit next to each other in class all semester long, sometimes they even have several classes together, and never get to know the person they are continually seeing. I think group work can be fun, on the other hand, it can be a royal pain in the ass too! The group I was in was wonderful. Thomas took the lead, he's a born leader. He got the ball rolling, which is good when some members of the team are shy. Haley was bouncy. It's awesome when a group can have an energetic person around to keep them up and going. Tristan was a hardworker, but a little quiet. That's not a bad thing, I'm really quiet when I don't know anyone. He was calm enough to keep us all on track...awesome! Chris was funny. He had so many women's clothes that he brought in for his costumes that I was simply amazed that a man could own that many old woman shirts without them being handed down by their grandma! I've been in groups all semester long in all my classes. This group was by far my favorite! Each person brought something fun and rewarding to the table. Personalities matched well and it was fun to actually do the presentation.
The single presentations we had to do were more terrifying for me, but that's because I'm super shy and don't like to get in front of people. Kinda seems stupid since I want to be a teacher. I know that, but kids don't scare me half as bad as people my own age. Then again, I'm so damn old that I'm practically geriatric! I guess if I would have looked at it from that point of view, I would have realized I'm about 5 years older than everyone else in the class. Would have made things a little easier for sure. I thought I was prepared to do just a 3 minute presentation, but apparently I can talk longer than I figured! The main point I wanted to get at about my paper was that sex encompasses so much and so does the bible. In real life they go hand in hand. Sex in the bible is almost a must. It's a reference, a story inhibitor, and a learning tool.

Classes

I was so nervous when I first started this class. I knew I needed to stick with it, but I mainly took it because I thought it was goin to strengthen my faith in God, not make me question it. Dr. Sexson scared me to death! I wasn't sure if he was kiddin' about not knowing anything about technology or if he really didn't know. I mean, my own father who will be 50 on Jan. 9, 2010, doesn't even know how to turn on a computer! I have my father's ability to understand technological advances, so the fact that I even figured out how to set up a blog is a zillion COOL flags for me. So why would it be so strange to think that a man who said he didn't know much about technology really wouldn't know? Of course now I can honestly say, even Dr. Sexson has me beat in that department. Good Lord I think I need more training. So this brings me to my point after all. Classes at MSU all require this new technological stuff that I'm unfamiliar with and it scares me. What if I get into a classroom and I have no idea how to work a smartboard? What if the kids expect everything to be on powerpoints? What if I should know what a gobbilygoop (there's no such thing) function is and I'm completely stumped? I don't want to look like I don't know how to do my own job, especially in front of the students, and with technology progressingly like the speed of light, I'm afraid I'm doomed to wander the tech path alone. The blog was hard enough for me to get figured out and just thinking about how 10 years from now kids will be writing papers in what could be a completely new way, makes me wonder if I will cut it as a teacher. Will I? Do I have what it takes? Do I even want to be a teacher? These questions have been on my mind since the beginning of the year, but this class especially makes me question if I'm goin to be good at what I want to do with the rest of my life or if I'm destined to "F" it up! So, this class has taught me about the bible some, but more than anything this class has raised more questions for me to answer. I don't have answers. I know Dr. Sexson thinks there shouldn't be any answers for questions to the bible, but should there be any real defining answers to life either? UGH!

Song of Solomon

I had never read Song of Solomon before. I love it though! I had enjoyed the play that one group in our class had put on that I figured I should read it. I knew what my paper was going to be without having read Song of Solomon anyway. There was enough material within the first few books of the bible that I wasn't in desperate need of material from S.O.S. (my abbreviation.) However, the best thing about this book was that it showed a softer more sensual side that I think more people can relate to. It seems like everyone longs to be talked to in a way that makes them feel special and unique, but the books of the bible I had read before were harsh and critical. Now everything has it's place and I'm not sayin' I don't need to be told what to do every once in awhile, but not ever other sentence! Makes a person feel like they don't have free will anymore. Am I right or am I on my soapbox again? The words that permiate through S.O.S. fills the soul with warmth and strength. Now I know strength sounds a little weird here, but I truly believe that S.O.S. gives strength to the people who read it and absorb it, just like all those inspirational movies (ie the blind side). How? Think about it. What person isn't better off when they hear or read words like "Take me away with you-let us hurry!" Those words have power all their own. The fact that someone would be willing to go away with their friend or lover without any questions asked is a huge trust element. The fact that a person would allow another to trust them that much is another trust element. If a person could believe those words as much as the writer wants them to then they will be more inclined to trust and care; both of which make a person strong. Character is built up through the words in S.O.S. This book should be read by everyone, just so they can feel something more than "the real world." Besides, who doesn't love a little romance?

Job

The book of Job was one that I didn't expect to have so many twists and turns. I never remembered Job asking God why he was being punished...Why me? Why me? There's so much I missed in bible school when I thought I was paying attention, but apparently I'd been sleeping during all the good stuff. I guess what I got was the top and bottom of the oreo cookie and missed all the filling. I had heard that old saying, "he has the patience of Job" more than once. I always assumed, with what I'd heard in class that a person could have many troubles, stick to their faith, and not question God. I know I'm not one of those people though, I get myself into enough trouble and then sometimes it just comes for me, so I end up questioning God all the time. Knowing now that Job did have frustrations and really didn't have many patience is actually more comforting, with a hint of relief in there, than thinking he was some wonderfully kind man who could take anything. Ugh! Stories where no one has to question anything seem to leave out character. Shouldn't stories, parables, or whatever have a character that develops into more of an outstanding character by the end because they overcome their flaws rather than just be perfect to begin with? Makes the story much more interesting, to me anyway. I feel like I can relate to Job, but moreso now than I could when I thought he was some really righteous goodie goodie man. Thank God for Lacuna!

Bad day doesn't even come close!

I know everyone has bad days and that our blogs are supposed to be about the bible, but since bad days were discussed in class, I just have to tell my "bad day" story. First off, it wasn't one bad day, more like an entire week. So, I had to go home to Hot Springs, which is 4 and a half hours away, for a funeral. How fun right? Nope! Drove on crappy roads and had to see one of my favorite Aunts buried. Talk about a great start to the week. Then, I come back to Bozeman on crappy roads and when I try to go to class on Thursday I get stuck in the parking lot, without even gettin a spot to park. There were 5 other vehicles stuck too. All of which had to be pushed out before I could get my car pushed out. After that hour to hour and a half of mannual labor I was soaking wet from head to toe. So I decided the smart thing to do would be to go home and change instead of getting pnuemonia again. On my way home I almost got high centered in the middle of the highway. I had to speed up as to not get high centered and then I almost ran off the road because it was too icy to be driving faster. Lovely right? NOPE! To top it all off I had to work this weekend. I felt terrible Friday, did nothing about it, Saturday was worse with an ear infection, left work early, there's more money down the drain, Sunday went back to work and was told to go see a doctor. Surprise, Surprise; the big news.....I have strep throat! Yay, but at least now I'm not contagious anymore. I got the shot in the butt of penecillan and have been prescribes lovely meds like vicadin and steroids. However, this weekend I only got 4 hours of sleep total, couldn't eat for two of the days, and could barely swallow hot tea. To make the week even better I lost my drivers license and I have to study for three tests tomorrow. Shoot me please! By the way, I'm not askin why this is happening to me, more like, just kill me now. Not really, but ugh!

Reason for not being in class

I know our blog is supposed to be about the bible and our readings, but sadly I lost my sheet that had all of my contact info for my group, Esther. I won't be in class today because I have bronchitis and I'm contagious. I know we have a group meeting about the book of Esther, which I read, but I won't be able to make it today. I can write a few points that I thought of down on here though.
1. Esther was couragous, but she embodied some of the same principals as other women in the bible by not fully telling the king the truth of who she was.
2. I'm still a little confused on why Haman (sp?) hated the jews so much and why Esther was told to lie about who she was.
3. I thought about how we could present this to the class, maybe a skit would work. Sounded like it would be a fun story to act out. I'm not sure any of you will get this, but if you do and you want to talk about the ideas you can call, text or email me. I think you have my info. I'm sorry I can't make it today, I'm really sick and don't want anyone else to get this.

Never-ending Exodus

In the beginning of Exodus I was interested and following just fine. I was paying attention, I was understanding what was goin on, to the best of my knowledge, that is, and I was ready to get through to Leviticus. But then there was a wake-up call. Exodus turns into a pile of orders and instructions that are totally not fun to read! I had to look to see how big a cubit was....huge! I have been tryin to get through Exodus so that I can power my way through Leviticus and move onto something a tad more my speed, but I have to put down the bible every 5 minutes and do something a little more entertaining before I start to cry from reading every detailed order on how to make the tabernacle....or what seems to be, 50 other creations as well. The lacuna doesn't seem to be missing with all the details provided to make each monument, or how to have each feastival. Sometimes I think it's a little nicer not to have so much detail. Of course it would be better to have more detail in the actual human interaction, but that seems to be sparse, whereas there is no reason to keep it short and sweet when dictating right? Kinda makes me wish I had that kind of power. Not really, but it would be interesting if everyone had to listen to every single word you said.
Anyway, Thursday was an interesting day and the lecture was, for me at first, kind of confusing. I didn't really completely understand the whole most men, all women and children, and elderly are feminine thing, but towards the end it was making more sense to me. I liked how she drew the illustrations of how Israel always strays from God, but he keeps taking Israel back and how Hosea has to marry a woman completely unworthy and unfaithful just to reflect what God was doing with Israel. Then to think women in the bible were portrayed as "not clean" or "unfaithful" and how they were that way to prove God's point with Israel over and over again was an eye opener for me. It makes sense for sure. However, I kept thinking about Ruth and Mary and how they don't seem to fit into that scenario. So now my question is, What purpose do these righteous women pose if for the majority of the bible women are considered basically undeserving? Just curious. I would think the answer would be simple, but after taking this class so far, I'm starting to think there really are no simple explainations for anything.

Sticks and Stones

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me. What a crock right? I remember the first time my Mom told me that little fixer-upper for a poem. I was in Kindergarten and a boy who was in the 6th grade had been very mean to me, calling me names. His Mom was called into the Prinicpals office, but my Mom was never told of the incident by the faculty of the school. The boy was in the office when his Mom showed up to meet with our Principal. I was standing outside the door of the office when she arrived. Her first words were, "are you the one that got him into trouble?" What a joke! That kid didn't need my help to get into trouble. I nodded my head. She was a big woman and looked like a giant from where I stood. She asked me what he had said to me that could get her precious little deviant son in so much trouble. I told her, "he called me a little bitch." Of course, I had no idea what that word really meant at that time, but I get it now loud and clear. I knew it wasn't good though, from the tone in his voice and the look in his eye when he said it. When she heard what her son said she leaned down to me, squinting her eyes, wrinkling up her nose, her face growing more red from her anger, and her attitude was full of hate when she responded to me, "that's because you are a little bitch!" What a thing to tell a 5 year old huh? I went home that afternoon and told my Mom what had happened. Of course she ripped the administration a new one before she got to her speach for me, but she finally did get to it. She told me she loved me, that I wasn't "what her son had called you," and then began to recite that aweful poem. Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me. She explained what it meant, but she was wrong. My Mom was never wrong, yet she was that time! As stupid as it seems, those words still hurt me to this day. Not to mention the fact that "bitch" was my first learned cuss word. Yay me!

I thought about our discussion in class on Thursday, this whole weekend. Dr. Sexson is right. You never forget what hurts you when it comes in the form of words. But then I thought about it more when I went to the testicle festival last night. Words are very powerful, but the actions that back them up seem to be even more powerful. Like the look in their eyes when someone calls you a name or tells you no for a dance or how people walk as far as they can around you just so that they don't have to be near your pressence. So I started to think Dr. Sexon was wrong about words. Maybe words weren't really the thing that cut to the very core of a human-being, but maybe it was the action behind them. So this morning when I woke up I thought long and hard about it and I began to realize that actions are words. They just aren't spoken. The action of throwing a stick or stone is a nonverbal communication intended to hurt someone, whereas words are just a verbal usuage to do the same thing. That little poem, or whatever you'd call it, is contradictory. Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me. How are these two instances any different? If they are both looked upon as action and action is the equivalent of words then they are the very same thing. Maybe the saying should go, Sticks and stones may break my bones and words will always hurt me too. I realize this blog is supposed to be about the bible, but I thought this was relevant to class since we had been talking about language.

As for the bible part of this blog, let me just say, I'm at the very end of Genesis now and things are getting weirder. Jacob loving Rachel and having to marry Leah too. Finally making up with his brother Esau and then losing Rachel. Poor Dinah getting raped, and Jacob worrying about the consequences of his boys killing everyone in town more than how his daughter feels. I'm almost sickened by that story. Besides, why should Jacob even worry....or rather I guess his name is Israel, when God told him that he was going to be with him. If you have the greatest power in the world or universe or whatever on your side, why would you worry about what another man could do to you? It's so easy for Israel to forget God is with him and it takes getting on his knees, basically, to remember he is good in the sight of the Lord. Makes a person wonder why we forget the good things so easily.

The Mysteries of Genesis

I've been reading along in Genesis and truly trying to look at the authors along with the actual words used in the text. However, the story can be so "out there" at times that I c0mpletely forget to think about who the author could have been and I focus on figuring out how a text that is supposed to be used for righteousness can have so many crazy characters and experiences. Like for instance when the two girls sleep with their father, dang I wish I had my book with me right now, but it's in like Genisis 20 or 21. Dude, NASTY!!!!!! I understand that in the story of the bible, for man to produce and there to be so many humans on earth, that people were, well, "hooking up" with their blood relatives in order to do so, but when there's already a world full of people there is no excuse for sleeping with one's father. I almost slammed the bible down then and thought about dropping the class. I know we are supposed to be reading the bible as a text for literary purposes, imagery, and all that, but it's hard to let my faith go. This story shook my faith. Then to make things worse, the fact that Abraham gets to lie to people all the time, the man is kind of a screw up, although a God-fearing screw up, and he gets away with it. I always thought stories had a rhyme or reason to them. A meaning that, as a reader, would be seen and understood. I do NOT get why Abraham is in such good faith with God when he lies and is almost moronic acting. The story of the two girls and their father, were obviously a need to have in this text, but why? I mean really, why? Is it to show what not to do to disgrace God or is it some sick twisted story for some other purpose? Right now I'm in such shock from reading all this that I'm not sure I ever want to read anymore ever again. I find it interesting though, how the Old testament is so different from the New Testament. The New Testament shows a loving, caring God who shows the reader what lesson is supposed to be learned, but in the Old Testament, it's like God is jealous and vengeful. The Old Testament has stories that are hard to understand because there seems, to me, to be no reason for them. Nothing ever really gets explained. However, the words used to write these stories illustrate, in my mind, the perfect setting for all of them to take place. Right now, I'm not sure how I feel about this text.

Genesis-It's so wordy!

So I have been reading Genesis and although I thought I was bored, I realized I really wasn't bored at all. However, I am having a very hard time getting into it because I can't pronounce half the names. Like, Hagar? I'm sure it's spelled most likely how it sounds, but then we go on to Sarai and so on. Those two are probably the easiest ones out of the hard choices, but even they stump me. Not that I was ever really into names or anything, but it just makes it feel like I have to read 4,000 more words than there really are in each chapter. I have found some interesting stuff so far, like the cherubim and sword on fire thingy. That was interesting. I've always just thought of Michael, the Angel who watches over Satan and hell, to be the one with a flaming sword, but the sweet cherubim that most people think of sounds like a good new twist on the same old Valentine's ideals.
I have found the wording to be redundant, as was discussed in our first couple meetings in class, but it's even more apparent now just how redundant everything is because, of course, my eyes are more apt to see what I'm told about. That's been a bit of a pain. I've had to re-read so many names in the first few chapters of Genesis now that if I didn't have this blog to do all semester I probably would have stopped reading already.
I do like the idea of trying to read the bible all the way through in this semester. At first I thought it was completely nuts, but now that I'm getting into the imagery and words of the text I'm beginning to find it more interesting. Like how some verses are written more as poetry while others are written as a story broken up into sections. It seems easier for me and faster for me to read the poetry like verses because they seem to fly by, there are less words or something that seem to move the text along. Weird I know, because the punctuation would make one think there would be more stops, pauses, and breathes that would slow one down, but it works better for me. So I guess, surprisingly enough, I'm learning more about how I learn doing this than I am necessarily about the bible. HMMM, interesting.

P & J writers

As I read the first Chapter in Genesis I was looking for the "P" writer that we had discussed in class. I can see the order of things as if a priestly figure was talking and I can see how matter of factly the story goes. Because it is ordered in such a way that it acts as a list almost, I believe the first story to be easier to follow. It's logical, in the ordering of events. The second story does sound like a completely different author is being read. The "J" writer is more colorful, vivid, and entertaining in their account of creation. The story is one that makes a person more eager to read on, but the imagination has to be used more in this story. I'm all for that, but some people might not like having to think outside the box. The "J" writer moves events and is not specific as to what times or days things are being completed. The difference between the stories of Adam and Eve, to me, are not so far from each other that I would have noticed right away, without the lecture from Thursday's class. The "J" writer goes into more detail in how Eve was created, but the "P" writer, to me, makes Adam and Eve sound like they were created to help each other, just as the "J" writer indicates. Both stories are good, they express what is being done in a part of history so that anyone can follow them. Depending on what a person can relate to more, each story has it's advantages and disadvantages. Of course, they are both up to personal choice in which is more believable as well. I like the imagery of the second story better because it's a clear picture and more discriptive. The first story, however, is a step-by-step process that makes for an easy read in my opinion. The styles of writing are very apparent though, something I would not have caught onto as quickly if I had not been introduced to the "P" and "J" writers.

Thoughts on "The Slave"

"The Slave" by Singer was a bit of a shocker for me. I'm only on page like 48 or something, but wow, I was so not expecting there to be so much incest and uncuth behavior in this book. I like this book so far, but I'm still in shock of the direction it is taking. To me, Singer has portrayed the Christian faith as being nothing more than a rude mix of rituals and superstitions. He has portrayed the Jewish faith as if it were the only one and correct faith to have. That's fine, but I wasn't expecting to find that every "Christian" as he calls them, to be a murderer, cheat, liar, filthy piece of dirt, and mallicious creature where his character Jacob is made to be a glorified God almost. Of course this is only my opinion and I still am excited to finish this book. To see the twists and turns that I hope it will encounter and uncover, but for the most part, the two worlds that he describes are far from reality, again, in my opinion.